chronic pain stuff
Mar. 5th, 2025 09:48 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
iimpavid I've been working for a while on the whole "chronic pain" thing. I got rid of my ovaries and have engaged regularly in physical therapy (for both my back and pelvic floor), yoga, and massage...
My TENS unit, though, has had a profound effect on my life these last two weeks. This particular unit has a dial that runs to 10. I stick between 3 and 4 currently, for an hour at a time, with breaks in between. When I'm not working I'm attached to it. It's reduced my anxiety, almost eliminated the chest pain that's been plaguing me for months... but only when its in use. My wife tells me that, at night, once I get hooked up to the TENS unit I pass out more or less within ten minutes. She tells me that it's a result of pain relief-- of course I pass out when the TENS unit goes on. My body is taking advantage of being relaxed to heal.
I shouldn't be surprised, really, that electrical stimulation is the most effective solution to what ails me. Part of the spiritwork I've undertaken this last year has marked me out as being descended of the Ironwood's Lightning Tribe-- Jotun lineages in humans tend to run a little funny anyway, those of the Ironwood even more so. It's a little funny. I've been getting some amazing sleep for the first time in years, so it's not like I'm not grateful.
I'm scared it'll wear off, though. That I'll develop a tolerance and eventually it'll no longer work so well. That I'll experience some unknown side effect that'll mean I have to stop using it. This fear is proportionate to the level of benefit I experience while using a TENS unit. I've never once, in my entrie life, experienced this kind of instant, consequence-free pain relief. No drug or other treatment has done this for me-- after all, getting rid of my ovaries has had ongoing side effects that are simply "insignificant compared to endometriosis" rather than "nonexistant". The worst thing I've noticed so far is that I need to take an astringent to my back when the electrodes come off-- the adhesive makes me break out.
In other sudden solutions that came at my wife's behest (they often know better than I do what will help me out): I am now the owner of a weighted snake. This particular snake is named Heracles. He came from a local autism-centric store. The second M put him over my shoulders in the store, I stopped talking and every muscle in my shoulders, neck, and face relaxed. Heracles' fabric is a little juvenile but I'm taking care of that by crocheting him a sweater-- that way I can feel better about him accompanying me to work.
My teacher, K, pointed out that Jormundgandr seems to have an ongoing relevance in my journey-- and he's incredibly correct. I had an experience with Jormundgandr in the middle of 2023, right before I met K, while I was still dealing with some issues involving the Dead that I couldn't resolve on my own. That experience was my "sign" that my oncoming work with the Dead was my starting place-- but not my ending place. I've been gravitating, for years, toward a look that's a very victorian-butch-flavored combination of "colorful and/or jingly skirts" and men's shirts on top with heavy boots or no shoes at all. This is a very ergi look, which jives for the Great Guarding Snake and Their holy liminality. They lack a gender entirely and that's something I relate to, deeply. So, it naturally follows that it would be a snake that helps me keep calm.
This led to a greater conversation around gender that I've been having with myself. I've noticed that I feel the most joy when clerks are confused about which restroom to refer me to, for example. I also love to answer "what are your pronouns" with "thank you for asking, that's very courteous-- use whatever you'd like, I don't have a preference"-- this always throws the well-meaning through a loop, since they're barely aware of multiple genders existing. It seems that a lack of gender is yet more baffling. I like challenging that kind of thing.
Is there social etiquette around when to cut posts on Dreamwidth? Pillowfort has the general "if the post is longer than one screen, then cut it" thing.
My TENS unit, though, has had a profound effect on my life these last two weeks. This particular unit has a dial that runs to 10. I stick between 3 and 4 currently, for an hour at a time, with breaks in between. When I'm not working I'm attached to it. It's reduced my anxiety, almost eliminated the chest pain that's been plaguing me for months... but only when its in use. My wife tells me that, at night, once I get hooked up to the TENS unit I pass out more or less within ten minutes. She tells me that it's a result of pain relief-- of course I pass out when the TENS unit goes on. My body is taking advantage of being relaxed to heal.
I shouldn't be surprised, really, that electrical stimulation is the most effective solution to what ails me. Part of the spiritwork I've undertaken this last year has marked me out as being descended of the Ironwood's Lightning Tribe-- Jotun lineages in humans tend to run a little funny anyway, those of the Ironwood even more so. It's a little funny. I've been getting some amazing sleep for the first time in years, so it's not like I'm not grateful.
I'm scared it'll wear off, though. That I'll develop a tolerance and eventually it'll no longer work so well. That I'll experience some unknown side effect that'll mean I have to stop using it. This fear is proportionate to the level of benefit I experience while using a TENS unit. I've never once, in my entrie life, experienced this kind of instant, consequence-free pain relief. No drug or other treatment has done this for me-- after all, getting rid of my ovaries has had ongoing side effects that are simply "insignificant compared to endometriosis" rather than "nonexistant". The worst thing I've noticed so far is that I need to take an astringent to my back when the electrodes come off-- the adhesive makes me break out.
In other sudden solutions that came at my wife's behest (they often know better than I do what will help me out): I am now the owner of a weighted snake. This particular snake is named Heracles. He came from a local autism-centric store. The second M put him over my shoulders in the store, I stopped talking and every muscle in my shoulders, neck, and face relaxed. Heracles' fabric is a little juvenile but I'm taking care of that by crocheting him a sweater-- that way I can feel better about him accompanying me to work.
My teacher, K, pointed out that Jormundgandr seems to have an ongoing relevance in my journey-- and he's incredibly correct. I had an experience with Jormundgandr in the middle of 2023, right before I met K, while I was still dealing with some issues involving the Dead that I couldn't resolve on my own. That experience was my "sign" that my oncoming work with the Dead was my starting place-- but not my ending place. I've been gravitating, for years, toward a look that's a very victorian-butch-flavored combination of "colorful and/or jingly skirts" and men's shirts on top with heavy boots or no shoes at all. This is a very ergi look, which jives for the Great Guarding Snake and Their holy liminality. They lack a gender entirely and that's something I relate to, deeply. So, it naturally follows that it would be a snake that helps me keep calm.
This led to a greater conversation around gender that I've been having with myself. I've noticed that I feel the most joy when clerks are confused about which restroom to refer me to, for example. I also love to answer "what are your pronouns" with "thank you for asking, that's very courteous-- use whatever you'd like, I don't have a preference"-- this always throws the well-meaning through a loop, since they're barely aware of multiple genders existing. It seems that a lack of gender is yet more baffling. I like challenging that kind of thing.
Is there social etiquette around when to cut posts on Dreamwidth? Pillowfort has the general "if the post is longer than one screen, then cut it" thing.
no subject
on 2025-03-06 02:16 am (UTC)Glad the TENS is helping. My SO used it years ago to help with back pain and found it pretty effective.